6 Seriously Cringeworthy Honey Boo Boo Moments

So there are very few depictions of Southerners on TV these days. I used to think this was a negative thing but now I'm not so sure. We basically get to choose between Real Housewives of Atlanta and... Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. Lovely. 

Now, I have seen this hot mess of a show before but I don't think I ever made it through a complete episode and now I remember why. I can't even begin to describe to y'all how painful it actually was. From never ending flatulence to trying to guess what words were being censored (to say this family uses exotic vocabulary would be a gross understatement) to feeling an overwhelming concern for the baby, I'm pretty sure I'm still traumatized. 

I've narrowed down my list of cringeworthy moments from 47 (this is not an exaggeration, it's the actual number...) to a mere six. Enjoy!

1. "PECHES"
An actual sign at a farm stand in good ol' McIntyre, Georgia- an actual town, not just a figment of redneck imagination. 

2. Mama June puts everyone's phones in a "safe place" a.k.a. an empty cheese balls container

Because Mama June was feeling "kinda overwhelmed," (with what I'm not sure) she decided it was time to take the girl's cellphones away- which she immediately regretted. 

"Not having my phone really sucks, like monkey balls. Feel like I'm back in, like, medieval times, because when they had black and white TV, when there was no cell phones, ****, I don't see how anyone lasted." -Actual Mama June quote

Historical inaccuracies aside, I tend to agree. 

3. Cup-A-Farts

This could potentially be the MOST cringeworthy moment for me... The number of times this family farted or discussed farting was astronomically high. Pair this with the local "pro" wrestling outing and this is probably what redneck heaven is like. 

"You fart in your hand and then throw it in your enemies face." -Cup-A-Farts explained. Joy. 

The other girls, lovingly referred to as Chubbs, Chickadee and Pumpkin, started the "Cup-A-Farts" chant at the wrestling event and were overjoyed when one of the wrestlers who "was doing good and then he wasn't" (seriously, give this girl Erin Andrews' job...) triumphed after busting out their favorite move. Seriously, watching this show made me appreciate my nice, normal, wrestling-free family more than I ever imagined I could. 

4. "Road kill is delicious."

First off, no. The Thompsons prefer roadkill to store bought meat because, "Why waste money in the store when it's fresher and cleaner on the side of the road?" Seriously. Not only did they go find this roadkill, they named it. It was slightly absolutely creepy that they kept calling this thing "Logan."  Poor Logan, the pig who apparently didn't look both ways before crossing the street... 

And there goes Logan...

5. Redneck Slip'N'Slide 

Because they were so bored without their phones, the girls decided to throw together stylish new trash bag dresses, cover the floor in cooking oil and themselves in enough butter to make Paula Deen say, "Y'all need to calm down" and proceed to try and slide around the house. Mostly, they fell a lot. When Mama June comes home, she actually says, "This is what happens every time I leave y'all by y'all selves!" Woah, woah, woah... this is a regular occurance?! 

"Mo butter, mo better." -This is the title of the episode. It's kind of like "Mo Money, Mo Problems" but fatter. Fatter than Biggie. 

6. Alone Time

All Sugar Bear wants for his birthday is some alone time with Mama June. His plan is to seduce her with a Swiss Roll and she is not impressed. 

"If you wanna romance me and you wanna get in my pants, per se- new crockpot, new deep fryer... might get you to first base." -Mama June 

This is, thankfully, where the episode ended. I was going to have to turn the channel if they were about to "get frisky." 

So there you have it, y'all. This is what the majority of the country sees as a representation of life in the South... ugh. Will you be watching the rest of this season? I don't know if I'll be able to.  

Happy Birthday Luke Bryan!

And thank you Tumblr for the endless supply of Luke Bryan shaking it gifs!

With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair...

The first thing anyone thinks of when it comes to music festivals is style. Coachella, Bonnaroo, Austin City Limits and so on each have a distinct style- location and weather usually play a major factor, but recently one trend has been popping up across the board... flower crowns!

I first really fell in love with the idea of flower crowns after seeing a few of Michelle Madonna's ThatMadonnaGirl halos. Celebrities like New Orleans native- Stassi Schroeder (of Vanderpump Rules) and current Atlanta girl, Nina Dobrev, have been sporting halos not only at music festivals but anywhere from date night to running errands. 

Stassi Schroeder

Nina Dobrev

Now, I have a few halos and am obsessed with them. I wore one recently for the 4th of July, and so many people came up to compliment it since it’s something really unique. The beauty of these halos is that there’s no wrong way to wear them and they come in literally every color imaginable. Plus, if you can’t find a color combo you like...they’re super easy to make (a DIY post will be coming soon!).

One of #ModernMagnolias' favorite bloggers, Mary from Happily Grey, recently posted a fabulous outfit featuring a flower crown. She added a fun, Nashville vibe to the outfit that we really love- but let's be honest... we'd probably exchange those boots for our cowboy boots :)

BOHO AT DAYBREAK

Don't you just love how fun and unique these crowns make every outfit?? Here, here and here are a few of my favorite places to find these lovely accessories :) Would you wear a flower halo? How would you style it? Let me know over on Twitter!

-Amelia :)

And for your listening pleasure- "After The Storm" by Mumford & Sons. This lovely song inspired the title for this post. Enjoy!

Take Back The Night

Favorite Southern son, Justin Timberlake, released his first album in seven years back in March... and all God's children said, "Amen." 

Well one album just isn't good enough for this beau- another one is coming out this fall. Check out the first single from part two of The 20/20 Experience. I promise, you're going to want to get up and dance. 

You can listen to the full song here. Do you love it as much as we do?! Let us know over on Twitter- @ModernMagnolias. 

Let's all take a second to thank the South for this...

Every Southern Belle needs her Southern Beau, so take a look at what beautiful men the South has brought you! Grab a glass of sweet tea, you're going to need something to cool yourself down after reading this post!

The South brings you the funny guy...

15. Aziz Ansari Columbia, South Carolina

The Parks & Recreation star on being called a redneck: "I would instead say I'm a Southerner. I really like fried chicken and biscuits."

14. Justin Timberlake Memphis, Tennessee

Justin Timberlake is a triple threat: funny, handsome, and a Southerner. Justin is sharing his love for the South with his new barbecue restaurant, "Southern Hospitality" in New York City

13. Ed Helms Atlanta, Georgia

Known for his roles in The Hangover and The Office, Ed Helms shares his love for Southern food: "Those of us who have tried Southern food and love it should stick with it. Even if it's not good for the body, it's good for the soul."

12. Jason Sudeikis Fairfax, Virginia

Saturday Night Live funny man loves to pay homage to his roots by incorporating his Southern accent into his skits. See Jason impersonating Brad Paisley here

The South brings you the leading man...

11. Jamie Foxx Terrell, Texas

The White House Down star explains how he stays himself in Hollywood: "A southern gentleman takes the good, bad, ugly, all of it, but he remains a gentleman. That's what I was taught; that's how I was brought up."

10. Morgan Freeman Memphis, Tennessee
 

Oscar winner and the world's greatest narrator, Morgan Freeman cant choose just one of his favorite Southern dishes. "Collard greens—or turnip greens. Cornbread and fried chicken."

9. George Clooney Lexington, Kentucky

George Clooney returns to his Southern roots while starring in "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" People's "Sexiest Man Alive" even owned his own pig, Max, for eighteen years.

8. Johnny Depp Owensboro, Kentucky

The Lone Ranger star on playing Southern roles: "Southern culture is very unique and there is something gentlemanly and suave about the way men behave. There's usually less bravado and a kind of respect for people and for women that men in other parts of the country don't have."

The South brings you television's most beautiful men...

7. Chace Crawford Lubbock, Texas

The Gossip Girl heartthrob was recently seen playing beer pong with Lauren Conrad at Justin Timberlake's restaurant Southern Hospitality. Can you even picture a more perfect night!?

6. Chord Overstreet Nashville, Tennessee

Glee's Chord Overstreet perfect girl? “A girl who’s funny, sweet, likes to laugh, and is a good girl. She needs to have somewhat of a taste for country music. And she has to be from the South."

5. Michael Hall Raleigh, North Carolina

HBO's Dexter star clearly has his priorities straight! "I like to think I am well-mannered. If I have the option at a breakfast place, I'll go with the grits. That's how Southern I am."

4. Ian Somerhalder Covington, Louisiana

The Vampire Diaries star loves returning to his roots.  "The thing I miss most about my hometown-- Covington, Louisiana-- is being immersed in nature."

And most importantly, the South brings you the men of Magic Mike... 

 

3. Matthew McConaughey Uvalde, Texas

"It's very easy in the South. Time moves a little slower, and we like it that way." Look out for the Southern Beau in his new movie, The Wolf of Wall Street!

2. Matt Bomer Spring, Texas

There's actually nothing greater than listening to White Collar's Matt Bomer speaking in his Southern accent

1. Channing Tatum Cullman, Alabama 

Channing explains how growing up in the South molded him into the man he is today. (AND WE THANK YOU FOR THAT!) “It teaches you to be a gentleman and to be very respectful and polite to women. I would get a slap on the back of my head if I didn’t open the door for my mother or sister. The greatest compliment anyone could ever pay me would be to say that I’m a gentleman.”

Nothing quite says "Southern Gentleman" like a nice cowboy hat...

 

1. Ian Somerhalder 2. Channing Tatum 3. Chord Overstreet 4. Chace Crawford 5. Jamie Foxx 6. Mathew McConaughey 7. Morgan Freeman 8. Johnny Depp 

 

The Evolution of Justin Timberlake's Cowboy Hat

(Justin deserved his own collage)

As you can see, Justin has always been rocking his cowboy hat, there was a little bump in the road in the early 2000's, but it's back and better than ever!

 -Chloe
@Chloe_Ewing

Party In The USA!

What better way to celebrate America's freedom than throwing a huge party?! We've got the perfect patriotic playlist to get your day started right.  



Have fun and stay safe y'all!

Four Must Haves For Celebrating The 4th

Regardless of where you're going or what you're doing, these four items will make sure you are festive and on-trend. They can go with almost any outfit and are so fabulous you'll want to rock them right through Labor Day!

1. White nail polish 

Essie's Blanc

From the red carpet to the runway, crisp white manicures are all the rage this season. We love this option from Essie because it doesn't look like you got bored at work and took the White-Out to your nails. 

2. Mirrored sunglasses

Ray-Ban Aviators

Let's be honest, who doesn't love a good pair of Aviators?? They look fabulous on every face shape, are effortlessly casual while also being totally chic and add that vintage Top Gun vibe to an otherwise boring day. Mirrored shades are where it's at this season and what better way to celebrate America's birthday than with this super fun blue pair??

3. Red lipstick

MAC's Lady Danger

Is there anything that adds that extra kick to a look like a fierce, red lip? Nope. Seriously, you can throw on this bold lip color and the aviators and be done for the day...
Are you more of a gloss girl? No worries... we've got you covered, too. 

Sephora's Cream Lip Stain in Always Red 

4. Flower crown

That Madonna Girl's Patriotic Halo

If you haven't seen everyone from celebrities to everyone who has attended a concert in the past few months wearing these flower crowns, you have clearly been living under a rock. They add a bit of sass to every outfit and let the world know about your carefree, fun-loving attitude with just one look. (If flower crowns don't cut it for you, we suggest this Marley Lilly baseball cap. Just as cute but a little more conservative.)

We hope all of y'all have a very happy and safe Fourth of July! God bless America!!