Life Lessons From My Southern Mama

Mary Lauren and her sweet, Southern mama- Paula

Every Modern Magnolia knows that the Southern mama is nothing short of a force to be reckoned with. She’s the one who forced you to wear giant bows and smocked dresses. She’s the one who told you to sit up straight and cross your legs. She’s the one who forced you to wear holiday sweaters until you were a teenager because they’re “so much cuter than a t-shirt.” (What? No one else?) Regardless of what your mama made you do- or wouldn't let you do, she taught you everything you know. Your mama is who you have looked to for guidance and is the reason you know how to put together the best tailgate your friends have ever seen.

Now y’all know there is no way I can list all the lessons I’ve learned from my mama, but I am going to go through some of the things I’ve found most useful and plan to pass on to my daughter one day.

Thank you notes. Never underestimate the value of a handwritten note. As opposed to sending a typed letter via snail mail or an email, you taking the time to sit down and write your thanks to someone will go a long way. It shows that you appreciate what they have done for you so much that you have taken the time to sit down and write it out. And don’t think that this should only be done for graduation or wedding gifts. Thank you notes are always good. Have a job interview? Afterwards, you better write a note to thank them for taking time out of their busy schedule to meet with you. It seems like a small gesture but it is a very important one. My mama’s suggestion: Have personalized note cards made. Whether it’s your monogram or your name, invest in something classic and simple. My senior year of high school, my mama ordered me monogrammed stationary to write thank you notes for graduation presents and I am still using the leftover note cards!

Hostess gifts. Whether you are staying with your friend’s family at the beach for a week or going to your neighbor’s Christmas party, a gift for the hostess is always a nice touch! Whoever has put the event together has worked hard and this is a great way to say, “Thank you for having me!”

Think about it- how nerve-wracking is it to meet your boyfriend’s parents? If you bring his mama a hostess gift, she’ll love you for it! Now don’t think you have to go crazy when buying a hostess gift. My mama’s suggestion: Try some cute cocktail napkins wrapped up with an inexpensive serving piece, a bottle of wine with a bow, a small plant, or a candle of your favorite scent! Just something thoughtful and meaningful that you think they would enjoy wrapped up cute, it will really show your appreciation. It’s not really about what the gift is, it’s more about the thought and the gesture.  

Coordinating serving pieces at a party. We’re all southern belles here, so I know you know this, but this is something my mama has driven home with me so I feel obligated to say it. When hosting a party- whether it’s a baby shower, wedding shower or it’s just your family/friends over for dinner, have coordinating serving pieces. There is nothing that drives me crazier than hors d'oeuvres at a party being served out of whatever bowl they were made/brought in. I’m not saying that every time you have a party you need to go out and buy all new matching serving pieces. I know we don’t all have silver y’all... we’re still a few years away from that but go to the dollar store and get some fun, matching pieces. They’ll look better than the plastic bowl with Mickey Mouse on it, I promise. My mama’s suggestion: Ask for nice serving pieces for your birthday/Christmas/whatever other holidays you celebrate, and then give your girlfriends serving pieces when you have to give them a gift! This is a great way to start a collection of pieces so that you have them when you are grown up and whatnot and need to throw a party! My mama has been giving me serving pieces as gifts since I was in high school!

Every girl needs a little black dress. I absolutely believe this. Of course if you are going to a wedding or a fancy party you want to go buy a new dress even though you have piles in your closet- we’re ALL guilty of this at one time or another (I’m probably the guiltiest). But the wedding is tomorrow and you hate everything you’ve tried on in every store, what are you going to wear? THE GO-TO LITTLE BLACK DRESS HANGING IN YOUR CLOSET. Your guy friend needs a date for a cocktail party tonight and you just don’t have time to go shopping? GIRL, BUST OUT THAT LITTLE BLACK DRESS. I’m being dramatic about this but, in all seriousness, get a black cocktail dress for your closet. Really, if you don’t own one, stop what you are doing and go shopping right now. My mama’s suggestion: Spice up your LBD with accessories! Get several fun-colored sashes- you should probably go ahead and monogram them! Tie that sash into a big bow around your waist and you’re ready to go! And don’t forget about pairing your black dress with a fun pair of shoes or a sassy clutch!

I want to know what lessons your Southern mama taught you! Tweet @ModernMagnolias with your mama’s best tips and tricks using #ModernMagnolias and we’ll pick our favorites to feature in a future post.

-Mary Lauren

Find Mary Lauren on Twitter: @LaurenReddeck