Somehow I always get assigned the task
of stalking some sports team’s roster for good looking southern
beaus (which I totally do NOT hate by the way). So, with the Super
Bowl coming up, obvi this had to happen again. We all know Modern
Magnolias love any excuse to be social, so I know y’all will be at
Super Bowl parties on Sunday. If anything, this post will help you
drop some names and impress and beaus you’re watching the game
with. FYI: the teams playing in Super Bowl XLVIII are the Seattle
Seahawks and the Denver Broncos.
But before I begin, let me say this: I
do not actively keep up with professional football. Don’t get me
wrong, I understand football and enjoy watching it (college football
for the most part), so this post is not based on a players statistics
and how many years they’ve been in the NFL, and is in absolutely no
way an analysis of the teams. It’s based on important questions,
like: Are these beaus Southern? Do I think they’re cute? Did they
attend college in the South? Bonus points if I think they have a cool
name.
Let’s start with the Seahawks:
1. Doug Baldwin-#89
Baldwin got drafted to the Seahawks as
a free agent in 2011, and from what I learned via Wikipedia he’s
done pretty well for the Seahawks, so he’ll play on Sunday for sure
(via my expert analysis). Also, he apparently has his own YouTube
series called “Fresh Files.”
Age: 25
Hometown: Gulf
Breeze, Florida
Position: Wide
receiver
College: Stanford
University (not in the South, but we’ll forgive him because he’s
pretty)
Twitter:
@DougBaldwinJr
2. J.R. Sweezy-#64
Okay literally half the reason he’s
on this list is his name. Like he just sounds like a professional
athlete. The internet tells me that he’s played 28 games for the
Seahawks and started 18, so here’s to hoping we see him on Sunday
night!
Age: 24
Hometown:
Mooresville, North Carolina
Position: Offensive
Guard
College: NC State
3. Clint Gresham-#49
-
Age: 27
Hometown: Corpus
Chisti, Texas
Position: Long
snapper
College: Texas
Christian University, Oklahoma State University
Twitter: @Gresh49
Now for the Broncos:
1. Britton
Colquitt-#4
This is him being
adorable with his family (I’m assuming), wearing cowboy boots..
SWOON.
He’s married
(bummer), but it’s okay to look, right?!
Age: 28
Hometown: Knoxville,
Tennessee
Position: Punter
College: University
of Tennessee
2. Wes Welker-#83
-
Soooo he’s married
too, but whatever. It’s clear he thinks he’s a model and I don’t
hate it. And Wikipedia says he’s like really good so he will
definitely be catching some passes on Sunday night.
Age: 32
Hometown: Oklahoma
City, Oklahoma
Position: Wide
Receiver/Return Specialist
College: Texas Tech
University
Twitter: @WesWelker
And last, but
certainly not least…
3. Peyton
Manning-#18
Yeah, I know he’s
wearing a Colts uniform, but LOVING THE BLACK AND WHITE Y’ALL.
He may be getting close to 40 but obviously I could not leave this
beau off the list. If you don’t know who Peyton Manning is, you’re
probably living under a rock. He played for the Colts for forevs and
started playing for the Broncos in 2012. Manning already has a Super
Bowl championship under his belt but is seeking his first as a
Bronco. Confession: I will probably be a bandwagon fan for the
Broncos on Sunday night for the sole reason that I know who Peyton
Manning is. And let’s be honest y’all, you would want your
husband to look like him when he’s close to 40.
Age: 37
Hometown: New
Orleans, Louisiana
Position:
Quarterback
College: University
of Tennessee
So obviously there
are more Southern beaus that play for the Seahawks and the Broncos but there was no way to include them all. Comment below or tweet us
any that we left off. Seriously, I’m going to be watching the game
and I wouldn’t mind knowing which man candy to be on the lookout
for while I’m waiting on the Bruno Mars concert and watching the
commercials.
Bonus facts that you
can throw out at any point during whatever Super Bowl party you’re
attending, in case you’re like me and literally don’t anything
about either team:
- This will be the Broncos’ seventh Super Bowl appearance. If they lose, it’ll be their fifth loss.
- The Seahawks have the NFL’s top-ranked defense in both scoring and yards and the Broncos have the top-ranked offense in both scoring and yards.
- Peyton Manning’s younger brother already has two Super Bowl rings, so like there has to be some pressure to catch up to baby bro. Peyton’s also trying to be first quarterback to win the Super Bowl as starter for two different teams.
- Forbes.com tells me that the Red Hot Chili Peppers are also playing at half time.. WHO KNEW?!
Happy Super Bowl
partying y’all!
